The assassination of Turning Point USA founder Charlie Kirk at a campus event in Utah has shaken the conservative movement and left his widow, Erika Kirk, struggling with profound grief.

Kirk, 31, was fatally shot in the neck on Sept. 10 while speaking to students at Utah Valley University. The outspoken activist had long been a polarizing figure, drawing both passionate support and fierce opposition. Now, his wife is sharing haunting new details of his final moments, the warnings they discussed before his death, and the devastating call that confirmed her worst fears, the New York Times reported.

In an emotional interview with The Times, Erika said law enforcement urged her not to view her husband’s body because of the damage caused by the bullet. She refused.

“With all due respect, I want to see what they did to my husband,” she told them.

At the hospital, she leaned over his body for a final goodbye. She kissed him one last time, noting his “semi-open eyes” and “Mona Lisa-like half-smile.”

“He’d died happy,” she said. “Like Jesus rescued him. The bullet came, he blinked, and he was in heaven.”